So many tools to be resilient (and so many that we don't use). There is exercise, eating healthy, sleeping well, having the support of family, friends and co-workers, better managing our thoughts, relaxation and mindfulness, there is curiosity to overcome fear and today in Healthy Work we talk about self-knowledge. There is no doubt that the better we know ourselves the better we will handle the pandemic or any stressful situation. Our beliefs they are not always obvious. In an iceberg where behaviors are what we see and values and thoughts rest on the surface of the sea, beliefs are deep within our being. A patient this week told me that during the storm Filomena that covered Madrid with snow a few days ago, he had no food in the fridge or in the pantry. And why didn't you ask for help? asked. I? He told me. I've never asked for it.
Beneath this idea that asking for help shows weakness is an ingrained belief that conditions how we deal with difficulties. Behind us we cannot trust anyone, or the world must be fair or I have little control over what happens to me are beliefs that are the result of interactions with our loved ones throughout a lifetime. Knowing them gives us an advantage in life. It makes us more resilient. When things get tough and there is no food in the fridge, we will have to fight the belief that we cannot ask for help.
Experts say that most beliefs are based on the need for achievement, the need for control or acceptance. In this time of COVID, in this world volatile, uncertain, complex and ambiguous that surrounds us we cannot control and it is easy to make mistakes Pretending that they always love us, control everything or make everything perfect are not beliefs that help us to be resilient by themselves, but knowing ourselves and knowing them can help us make the right decisions. We believe what we believe, but knowing it we can better choose what we want or should do to better handle difficult situations.