In our society we find ourselves with more and more demanding environments, so it is not surprising that we set ourselves more and more demanding standards, objectives and goals. Self-demand comes from wanting things to go well for us, and we have the idea that the more we try, the more likely it is that we will achieve it. However, when we fall short of those goals, it's easy for us to feel sad and frustrated.
But what can we do to reduce these demands that harm us so much?
The first thing is to create a list of all the demands we have, and divide them among those imposed by our environment such as “Make homemade cookies for the school parent meeting." and among those that we impose on ourselves, such as “I have to accept all the challenges that my bosses give me to give them a good impression”, o "I have to go to all my children's soccer games to be a good father/mother."
Next, we suggest you generate that list of demands and assign priorities. Which of these demands are relevant, which are urgent? We could give them an order and reject those that are not important. What is clear is that we can include free time to rest and recharge energy in that order of goals and priorities.
Finally, we must recognize our limits, what tasks I cannot perform or what events I cannot attend. We must remember and accept that we all have these limits, and that we can make mistakes. Error helps us learn new ways of doing things. Learning to delegate is another way of knowing how to deal with very high demands.
Learning to control our self-demand is a long process, which is trained daily, in which, in addition, the way we communicate and our assessment of ourselves influences. If you need a professional to help you manage your self-demand, do not hesitate to contact us.