Item from: TheMindIsWonderful
They say that friends are the family you choose. And it is that I do not intend to speak of any friendship, but of Friendship. With capital letters. That bond as strong as few, fruit of the chance to meet in life. That love that doesn't hurt or squeeze and knows how to be close from miles away.
The DRAE defines friendship as "Personal affection, pure and disinterested, shared with another person, which is born and strengthens with treatment". And I admit that this definition surprises and fascinates me in equal parts. Centuries of history have placed blood relations as the most stable, unconditional and affectionate… partially neglecting the global importance of friendship.
The importance of friendship
Friends are a point of support from childhood. They allow us to learn values, experience different roles and discover who we want to be. They help us build our identity, develop empathy and feel part of a group.
The concept of friendship is personal and, therefore, partially subjective. What we expect from this bond changes with time, experience, and circumstances. As we mature, we become more selective, we look for quality more than quantity and we have clearer the traits that define a true friendship (or at least the one we want to surround ourselves with).
In addition, friends and friends allow us to discover and develop different facets of ourselves. They help us to have a healthy self-esteem and cause positive emotions that allow greater psychological stability. We could say, therefore, that somehow friendship protects, cares for and strengthens us.
Characteristics of true friendship
Whether it's because we haven't had the chance to enjoy a true friendship or because we find ourselves in a moment of vital confusion, sometimes we have a hard time distinguishing between acquaintances, colleagues, colleagues and friends. These are some traits that define a true friendship.
- Trust and unconditionality: is that person you can trust. With which you can be you without filters, in a sincere and transparent way. It is a relationship based on the certainty of being able to absolutely trust the other person. Both when things are going well and when things are going badly, friends accompany us and convey their support. You know they're going to tell you the truth, even if it's not what you want to hear.
- Reciprocity: Friendship is a shared bond in which there is a bidirectionality in terms of communication, actions, feelings and interest. It is normal that there are stages in which, for some reason, we neglect this bidirectionality. When this happens it is important to empathize, learn and rectify. We can all be wrong. Real friends forgive and also teach us to be better friends.
- good wishes: a friend is happy when things go well for you, celebrates your successes and feels happy for your happiness. There is no room for envy or selfishness: a good friend is selflessly by your side.
- Motivation to share time and experiences: you want to share time, live new experiences and generate new anecdotes that strengthen the bond. Furthermore, no matter how much time passes and how many kilometers there are: when a friendship is true, the complicity remains intact.
- Freedom: friendship does not generate feelings of oppression. It allows you to be yourself and is based on respect. It makes you feel freer and a better person. It does not make you feel used or try to manipulate you. It does not require time or seek to make you someone you are not. Real friends invite you to think, offer you a space free of judgment and let you breathe.
"Who have a friend, have a treasure"
Friendship is not found in just anyone. There are many people who come and go. But sometimes, at the least expected moment, a spark jumps and that connection is created: something special, important and lasting. This does not happen many times in life. Therefore, if you have one of these Friendships (with a capital letter), take care of it. Don't take it for granted. Water it with patience, sincerity, affection and attention.
Important people mark our lives. So if you are lucky enough to enjoy such a friendship, you are an infinitely lucky person. You have a magical bond between your hands, something authentic and unconditional. You have a sister, an uncle for your son, or a partner forever. And it is that, if you have a true friendship, in addition to a precious asset, you have another reason to shine.